New Years Resolution: Self Acceptance
To welcome the new year, which is really an arbitrary number, we sometimes feel obligated to force a resolution upon our future selves. The wisdom of this tradition gets buried in egoic aspirations. If something isn’t important enough for you to start doing now, it isn’t going to be something you stick to doing at a set date in the future. We make our new years resolutions all about ourselves and how we want to be better versions of our selves.
But this is an upside down approach to change in ourselves. We must first embrace and accept who we are in our as-is state. Only then can we move towards positive change in our habits and lifestyle choices. Without this self love and acceptance, we are working against our true selves, forcing a change that does not originate from a secure place within ourselves. When we accept the as-is state of our being, we can move through change of habit as an evolution of the self, and accept each state of our selves along that journey. Instead of self sabotaging or chewing ourselves out when we fail, choose words of encouragement for your self. “I am human, I make mistakes, and I am a good person. I will continue on this journey of awareness and change.”
This January, start the year by embracing and accepting who you are in your as-is state. You are just the person you need to be right now. Move towards the positive change you desire in harmony with your current self, not at odds with your current self. Check out Ali at The Perception Trainers on youtube for further insight.
Document the Change
Another angle on the new year’s resolution is to document change. Sometimes we forget how fast time goes, how much has changed, and what we have accomplished during that time. Keeping a family blog, a jar full of memories, or a diary can be a wonderful way to note the change during the year, as well as provide personal or family introspection.
Reaching out to Others
Connecting with other people is incredibly healing, rewarding and beneficial to both parties. Whether you can give your time as a volunteer, your money to charity, or your attention to someone needing love; these things are guaranteed to bring you the most happiness.
If you are a parent with young children, giving more of your self and your time can sound overwhelmingly impossible. If volunteering is something you seek to do, look for organizations that welcome the help of your whole family. Reach out to others in your circle of friends and ask your kids help by sending cards, visiting elderly persons, or preparing a meal to bring to an acquaintance who is ill, elderly or recently birthed a child. Talk to your neighbors and introduce yourself the ones who just moved into the neighborhood, commit to regular visits with an elderly family member or take them out to run errands, or making sandwiches and pass them out to the homeless.
Whatever you decide speaks to you, remember that if you cannot find the change you want in the world, be the change.
Have a beautiful new year,