Fr. Cutié Scandal

Understanding why the Catholic church does not allow men to marry is a sticky, muddled mess. It is one of the few differences between the Eastern Byzantine and Roman Catholic branches that split in the Great Schism. In a nutshell, Catholic priests cannot be women because Jesus had a penis (so all priests must have penises like Jesus). Also, priests cannot use their penis for masturbation or sex (in or out of marriage) because the are “brides of Christ”… or grooms of Christ… wait, is that gay? The result is a large population of gay and straight men who cannot help themselves “beat the demon out” and run about horny as toads, many of whom prey on little boys or have secret affairs like our friend Fr. Cutié. Yes, that is his REAL last name.

Fr. Cutié was caught this week by the the tabloids getting cozy with a lady friend. He is a mega-catholic-church priest who was adored by his sheeple, I mean flock, and has a strong media presence on EWTN and in the Spanish community. [read the full Times Article]

The “bride of Christ” code words that are thrown around to describe a priest’s celibacy vows reminds me of so many Christians I know who have a love relationship with Jesus or God that is indistinguishable from a crush on a teacher or pop star. “God is love”, right? To anyone who has had to listen to a virgin, celibate priest’s sermon on how to have a good relationship, I feel your pain. You hear them at weddings all the time. It is akin to asking the Amish how to improve the battery life on your Prius.

Fr. Cutié is just another in the long line of religious hypocrites who say one thing and do another. The very types that this Jesus guy supposedly came to do away with. Celibacy in the church is a joke, and I care naught if it remains as is or changes to allow marriage. One thing is clear: human biology is strong and our DNA wants us to pass on our genes. The unnatural state of forced celibacy does more harm than good in repressing those needs rather than addressing them as parts of the human function. We eat, we sleep, we breath, we have sex.